note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
