plz talk dirty to me
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
