if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
She's like a pop up book from hell.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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