He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Randomize
