just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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