Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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