me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I intend to get homeless drunk
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
