Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
