is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
