If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
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