you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
