I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
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