I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
