Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
