ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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