Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize