I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
