He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
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