Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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