So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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