Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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