when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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