I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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