Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
