You're so nebulous sometimes
there's paper in my vomit.
Small penises have feelings too.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
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