She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Randomize
