I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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