My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
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