BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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