I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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