Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
