I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize