Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Found the puke drawer
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Randomize
