Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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