Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize