She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
