before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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