its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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