im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize
