Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
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