i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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