Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
