So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize
