At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Randomize
