we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Randomize
