I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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