Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
