Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
