Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Randomize