On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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