yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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