My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize
