i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
operation have a gay friend backfired
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
